a child learns: owning your life / dreaming


{Thanks to you many readers who have asked me the same questions which have led to these particular posts about owning your life.

 You readers and mothers that are so ready to take charge of your own life, leaving nothing to chance, and live incredibly the dreams you have held so tightly to--thank you.}


I 'm often asked how I balance a homeschooling life, household responsibilities, projects/baking with kids, errands and trips, me time, and doing it all with a large, young family.  It is definitely a delicate balance but it can be done and done well and (and extremely satisfying) no matter your children's ages or size of family.  Here is the first of some of my best advice broken up into easy-to-digest posts.

Decide what your dream life would be right at this moment and take the first step to living it.

Surprising first piece of advice?  Were you expecting advice on how to break up your day/time?  This piece of advice is paramount, life changing, and is the key to the most fulfilling, happy life for you and your family based on your wildest dreams.

 If you don't know what you really want (in terms of the big picture) for you as a parent/individual and for your family as a whole then you will never reach the level of satisfaction/peace/joy that you are capable of and never have the incredible life you "dream" of.   In our modern-day culture of easy access entertainment available at the flip of a button, ready-to-eat TV dinners in every corner store, and social media becoming the younger generation's main experience with communicating/relationships and use of all free time, it is no wonder that the old fashioned idea of dreaming then planning has been replaced with pinning pins and pacifying ourselves with the idea that "someday" we'll become something incredible.

If you want an incredible life, your own personalized incredible life (which will look like no one else's), start with deciding what your dream life would be right at this moment.  In a world so filled with mediocrity, you can rise above it and do amazing things!

Incredible benefits of knowing your personal "big picture" dream life:

  1. It pushes you to levels you never would have pushed yourself in order to live your dream life
  2. Gives you the momentum to reach for/become something amazing, individually and as a whole
  3. Is the only way to being truly successful and truly fulfilled in life, no matter your circumstances
  4. Gives you purpose when challenges and opposition come into your life


Knowing my personal "dream life" has made all of the difference.  That really is an understatement for me.  I see what I am trying to become, what I'm trying to do for me and my family that is non-mainstream and challenging, the goals I'm working towards personally and with my children, and see that what keeps me moving forward comes down to seeing the big picture.  When I feel defeated, faced with opposition, when I've had a bad day or second guess myself, there, in the precious pages of years of note taking is my answer: I want something more for me and my children.  I want an incredible life.  I will do whatever it takes to have it.

From the beginnings of our thoughts of homeschooling, to having each of our five children, to me wanting to learn to be less uptight and more patient as a mother, it all began with a bigger dream.  That bigger dream would become and still is daily the catalyst to me becoming more.  It is the only recipe for total fulfillment for any human being.


So let's get started.


How to decide and create your "dream life": 

  1. Find something to keep your notes in that suits you best; either a designated notebook or note-taking app (I heavily use Evernote on my iPad)
  2. Set aside quiet, alone time to sit and brainstorm what you really want out of life.  This is the most exciting, liberating part.  You can ask yourself these questions to get you started:
  • What did I envision my days would be like as a parent?  What did I envision that isn't happening that I still want?
  • What do I see (insert name of someone you admire) do that I'd love to do with my kids?  In our home?
  • What would I love my life to be like in 1 year, 3 years, 5 years from now?
  • What would I like my children to learn in our home? From life?  From different experiences?
  • What do my spouse and I dream or doing/seeing/becoming/owning someday?
  • What experiences do we want for our children? How do I want them to feel about learning?
  • What kind of parent do I want to be?
  • What kind of home to do want to have? How will people/my children feel in my home?
  • What personal ambitions do I have?
  • What do I really want to know, see, learn how to do or become?

After brainstorming (which may take many sessions or days to complete), compile all of your ideas, dreams, and hopes in your designated notebook.  You will probably have groupings of ideas for you personally and for your family/home life.  Write down some solid sentences that describes everything you want out of life.  The more details the better.  I know for me the more visually appealing I write my dream life the more I can really see it and believe having it.

Keep your written "dream life" close to you.  Add to it.  Change it up as needed.  Make it a living, growing document of what you are wanting and becoming.


Once you know and have your tangible "dream life" written, you are ready to take the first step.

The only way to live the life you dream of is to know it and now, take action.  (More on action tomorrow.)



Putting this post into practice:

  • Write your own "dream life" in great detail today.  Collaborate with your spouse and your children.
  • Read it regularly.  And I mean regularly.  My "dream life" is broken up into many subcategories and I read some aspect of it most mornings to energize me at the beginning of a day, to give me fuel, motivation, and direction.  Your "dream life" being written by you should totally excite you to read.  If it is in notebook form, keep it by your bed to add to or simply read each morning.  Do the same if it is written on a device.
  • Share it with people you are close with: spouse, children, parents, close friends.  It will keep the fire alive in you while keeping you accountable.  (Accountability comes with part two of the series.)
  • Print it or parts of it to tape on your bathroom mirror, in the car, or somewhere else.  The more you read it, the more you believe it, the more you will make choices to become it.

Part two of the series: A Child Learns: Owning Your Life / Planning.

Other posts from the homeschooling series:

a child learns: trust yourself

a child learns: trust children

a child learns: the decision 

a child learns: the series

the sleepy time gal