listening to myself

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Changes are happening over here.  Not so much with my health quite yet, but with me.  I've been feeling more and more as a robot as I drive all around town visiting new doctors, as they push meds I don't feel comfortable with and strongly encourage new treatments.  The feelings of fear and doubt and loss of control have grown so much which subsequently, affects what remains of my day with my children.

At this point, I usually sit down, have a pity party, and dub myself the victim here.

The other night before going to sleep, I realized what having faith is, if faith is what will get me from the unknown to trusting that something good can happen.  Faith means believing and taking action. Right then and there at 11pm at night I decided to take action and listen to myself and what felt right.  In the morning I would, of course.


Yesterday morning I made some important phone calls, making an appointment with a trusted chiropractor and doing the difficult task of canceling my 3x a week appointments.

Can I tell you how peaceful I feel?  Just as things were beginning to get out of control I (finally) started listening to myself and seeking a better option for me.

Have I lost the ability to listen to that inner voice because professionals that are trained and wise intimidate me?  I believe in modern-day medicine and healing but how I wish the individual would stand up a little bit more if they feel there is a better way.


Life is returning to normalcy more with fewer appointments and greater hope with the new path I'm taking.  Now our day's activities are based on how my head is feeling rather than my overwhelmed schedule of getting sitters just so I can sit in doctor's waiting rooms.  No other feeling beats the peaceful, assuring feelings of taking responsibility for one's life.


Do you listen to your whole self?

I'm trying.

the sleepy time gal